Post by Ganondorf on Jun 9, 2008 19:37:35 GMT -5
(Opening notes: This was originally posted as a birthday fanfic for me, but I decided to post it now.)
The Wiggin Trio and Gasser were all in a dark room. Gasser looked around and asked, “Where are we? I can’t see anything.” Well...
The lights flashed on! The room was decorated with many things you would find at a birthday party. Gasser then asked, “What are all these things doing here?” Well, emo--
“Not emo!”
Yes you are, so shut up before I make you drink poor man oil.
“What the heck is poor man oil?”
Stop asking questions. Anyway, your mom is poor man oil. Jelly and Don both ‘ooh’ed, and Bobobo remarked, “He got you good, Gasser.”
“Shut up, Bobobo.”
“Did I say you could address me?!” Bobobo bellowed, then started chasing Gasser with a chain saw.
Gasser freaked out, “Bobobo, you’re not normally this violent! What’s wrong with you?!”
Well, that’s the theme! For a birthday fanfic, I’m going to have random people torture you!
“Say what?!”
Bobobo! Anyway, let’s get it started!
Act 1: Petey Piranha
Gasser was suddenly in the middle of a soccer field, except soccer wasn’t the sport being played! It was really Strikers, the Mushroom Kingdom variant of soccer! The captains were Donkey Kong and Petey Piranha, and Donkey Kong’s team had just scored a goal.
Petey Piranha was ticked, and he slowly approached DK’s team. They backed away slowly out of fear, and happily, Gasser was not all the wiser.
“Happily?!” were the last words Gasser angrily spit out before Petey Piranha ate him whole! However, he quickly spit Gasser out, and Gasser ran away, right into my hands... Muahahahahaha...
Act 2: Ashuraman
Gasser ended up in a wrestling ring, and he was in one corner. In the other corner was a man with blue skin, three faces, six arms, and wearing traditional Roman garb.
“Who are you?” Gasser asked, but his only answer was a laugh that sounded like “Ka kakakakaka~!!”
A caption suddenly appeared under the wrestler, revealing his name as Ashuraman. Ashuraman swung his six arms with incredible power and technique, creating a small tornado. It sucked up Gasser, and it sent him spiraling off the ring and into the abyss down below as he screamed in agony... Hehehe...
Act 3: Megatron
Gasser was suddenly falling in the middle of a city, and he was about to crash into the pavement, when suddenly, a Cybertronian jet crashed into him!
Gasser cried in pain, “Just end it already!!” No, because I want to torture you some more. Besides, I thought emoes loved torture.
Gasser cried in misery, “Not emo!!” The jet then transformed into the ruthless Decepticon leader, Megatron! Megatron grabbed onto a building to stop his incredible velocity, then he threw Gasser to the ground. He then started chargin his lazer, and Gasser closed his eyes, preparing for the worst. Right before the lazer hit--
Act 4: He Who Must Not Be Named
Gasser was suddenly in front of an underground cave’s entrance. Next to the entrance, there was a sign. He said, reading the sign, “’This is Lord ---------’s lair. Please wipe your feet before entering, and have a good time.’ Hey, why was his name censored?”
Because if you say his name, his minions will come and get you... You know what? Go ahead and say it. “Alright? His name is Voldemort, big whoop.”
Suddenly, the minions of Voldemort came and-- oh crap, they’re after me, too, now! What? No, stay away, you rapists! Stay away!!
...
“Hello?”
...
...Whew, that was close. Anyway, the minion people grabbed Gasser and were dragging him into the entrance. Gasser yelled, “Switch to the next Act!!”
I was going to. Alright, then... Where’d the card go? Oh, here it is.
Final Act: ? ? ?
Gasser appeared suddenly in front of a hollow, metallic building surrounded by many bushes. Gasser muttered, “Thank goodness, this whole ordeal is almost over...”
Ordeal?
“Severe experience,” Emo kid, non conforming as can be, you’d be non conforming too if you were just like him, explained. “Would you stop doing that?!” No. Just go into the mysterious, ominous building already!
“Fine,” Gasser replied as he walked in. Right after he entered, all the bushes burst into flames to reveal the structure looked incredibly similar to the number 23...
Gasser arrived in the building and yelled out, “Hello?”
A gruff voice replied, “23!”
“...Oh... crap.”
23 Guy appeared in front of Gasser and punched him in the face! Gasser went flying into the wall, or he would’ve if 23 Guy didn’t grab him with a grappling hook and pull him back towards himself forcefully, yelling, “23!”
The torture continued on for several more hours, and amazingly, Gasser hasn’t died. “That’s because you are making it impossible for me to die to torture me even more!”
That is true, but anyway, 23 Guy then used his grappling hook to grab a spy satellite from its orbit and force it down, yelling, “23!!” With perfect timing, he grabbed the satellite just as it was about to hit him.
He then fired multiple lasers at Gasser before throwing the satellite itself at him. Gasser got hit by the brunt of the attacks. Wait, what does brunt mean?
“Main impact,” Emo said weakly. His last words were, “Not emo...” before laying his head down gently. He was dead...
Hmhmhmhmhmhmhm... hahahahahahahahahahahahaha... GYAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Oops, sorry. Got carried away. I have too much fun sometimes.
Epilogue
Gasser appeared back with the Wiggin trio, nearly beaten to death. Don Patch yelled, “Gas can, are you okay?!” and jumped on him, dressed as Beauty.
Gasser kicked him off and commented, “Not in the mood.”
Jelly asked, “Yeesh, Gasser. What happened to you?”
“Well--”
“I don’t care.”
Bobobo then turned to me and asked, “So... when do we get the cake?” I get cake tomorrow, but you guys don’t get any.
“Super Fist of the Nose Hair--”
Alright! Bobobo, you can have some, but nobody else. In fact, you don’t get meals on my birthday, Gasser. “Say what?!”
Bobobo! Yes, I get the last word again! In yo’ face!
THE END
(Closing notes: Hope you enjoyed reading this!)
The Wiggin Trio and Gasser were all in a dark room. Gasser looked around and asked, “Where are we? I can’t see anything.” Well...
The lights flashed on! The room was decorated with many things you would find at a birthday party. Gasser then asked, “What are all these things doing here?” Well, emo--
“Not emo!”
Yes you are, so shut up before I make you drink poor man oil.
“What the heck is poor man oil?”
Stop asking questions. Anyway, your mom is poor man oil. Jelly and Don both ‘ooh’ed, and Bobobo remarked, “He got you good, Gasser.”
“Shut up, Bobobo.”
“Did I say you could address me?!” Bobobo bellowed, then started chasing Gasser with a chain saw.
Gasser freaked out, “Bobobo, you’re not normally this violent! What’s wrong with you?!”
Well, that’s the theme! For a birthday fanfic, I’m going to have random people torture you!
“Say what?!”
Bobobo! Anyway, let’s get it started!
Act 1: Petey Piranha
Gasser was suddenly in the middle of a soccer field, except soccer wasn’t the sport being played! It was really Strikers, the Mushroom Kingdom variant of soccer! The captains were Donkey Kong and Petey Piranha, and Donkey Kong’s team had just scored a goal.
Petey Piranha was ticked, and he slowly approached DK’s team. They backed away slowly out of fear, and happily, Gasser was not all the wiser.
“Happily?!” were the last words Gasser angrily spit out before Petey Piranha ate him whole! However, he quickly spit Gasser out, and Gasser ran away, right into my hands... Muahahahahaha...
Act 2: Ashuraman
Gasser ended up in a wrestling ring, and he was in one corner. In the other corner was a man with blue skin, three faces, six arms, and wearing traditional Roman garb.
“Who are you?” Gasser asked, but his only answer was a laugh that sounded like “Ka kakakakaka~!!”
A caption suddenly appeared under the wrestler, revealing his name as Ashuraman. Ashuraman swung his six arms with incredible power and technique, creating a small tornado. It sucked up Gasser, and it sent him spiraling off the ring and into the abyss down below as he screamed in agony... Hehehe...
Act 3: Megatron
Gasser was suddenly falling in the middle of a city, and he was about to crash into the pavement, when suddenly, a Cybertronian jet crashed into him!
Gasser cried in pain, “Just end it already!!” No, because I want to torture you some more. Besides, I thought emoes loved torture.
Gasser cried in misery, “Not emo!!” The jet then transformed into the ruthless Decepticon leader, Megatron! Megatron grabbed onto a building to stop his incredible velocity, then he threw Gasser to the ground. He then started chargin his lazer, and Gasser closed his eyes, preparing for the worst. Right before the lazer hit--
Act 4: He Who Must Not Be Named
Gasser was suddenly in front of an underground cave’s entrance. Next to the entrance, there was a sign. He said, reading the sign, “’This is Lord ---------’s lair. Please wipe your feet before entering, and have a good time.’ Hey, why was his name censored?”
Because if you say his name, his minions will come and get you... You know what? Go ahead and say it. “Alright? His name is Voldemort, big whoop.”
Suddenly, the minions of Voldemort came and-- oh crap, they’re after me, too, now! What? No, stay away, you rapists! Stay away!!
...
“Hello?”
...
...Whew, that was close. Anyway, the minion people grabbed Gasser and were dragging him into the entrance. Gasser yelled, “Switch to the next Act!!”
I was going to. Alright, then... Where’d the card go? Oh, here it is.
Final Act: ? ? ?
Gasser appeared suddenly in front of a hollow, metallic building surrounded by many bushes. Gasser muttered, “Thank goodness, this whole ordeal is almost over...”
Ordeal?
“Severe experience,” Emo kid, non conforming as can be, you’d be non conforming too if you were just like him, explained. “Would you stop doing that?!” No. Just go into the mysterious, ominous building already!
“Fine,” Gasser replied as he walked in. Right after he entered, all the bushes burst into flames to reveal the structure looked incredibly similar to the number 23...
Gasser arrived in the building and yelled out, “Hello?”
A gruff voice replied, “23!”
“...Oh... crap.”
23 Guy appeared in front of Gasser and punched him in the face! Gasser went flying into the wall, or he would’ve if 23 Guy didn’t grab him with a grappling hook and pull him back towards himself forcefully, yelling, “23!”
The torture continued on for several more hours, and amazingly, Gasser hasn’t died. “That’s because you are making it impossible for me to die to torture me even more!”
That is true, but anyway, 23 Guy then used his grappling hook to grab a spy satellite from its orbit and force it down, yelling, “23!!” With perfect timing, he grabbed the satellite just as it was about to hit him.
He then fired multiple lasers at Gasser before throwing the satellite itself at him. Gasser got hit by the brunt of the attacks. Wait, what does brunt mean?
“Main impact,” Emo said weakly. His last words were, “Not emo...” before laying his head down gently. He was dead...
Hmhmhmhmhmhmhm... hahahahahahahahahahahahaha... GYAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Oops, sorry. Got carried away. I have too much fun sometimes.
Epilogue
Gasser appeared back with the Wiggin trio, nearly beaten to death. Don Patch yelled, “Gas can, are you okay?!” and jumped on him, dressed as Beauty.
Gasser kicked him off and commented, “Not in the mood.”
Jelly asked, “Yeesh, Gasser. What happened to you?”
“Well--”
“I don’t care.”
Bobobo then turned to me and asked, “So... when do we get the cake?” I get cake tomorrow, but you guys don’t get any.
“Super Fist of the Nose Hair--”
Alright! Bobobo, you can have some, but nobody else. In fact, you don’t get meals on my birthday, Gasser. “Say what?!”
Bobobo! Yes, I get the last word again! In yo’ face!
THE END
(Closing notes: Hope you enjoyed reading this!)